“You must be so lucky to be doing nothing all day at home!”
“Why isn’t the house clean? Weren’t you home the whole day?”
“It must be nice to do whatever you want, whenever you want!”
Sounds familiar? I’ve been bombarded by comments like these ever since I became a stay at home mum. Being one doesn’t mean I have all the time in the world. In fact it feels like I have NONE of it at all when all I ever do is pick up a crayon here and wash a dish there.
Cleaning your house and trying to keep it clean are two different things. Let me share with you how I decided that things needed to change before I lost my mind.
Prioritise Yourself
Believe it or not, the first rule of thumb to keeping your sanity (as if you haven’t lost it yet) especially when it comes to cleaning, is to actually put yourself first. Not the dirty dishes. Not the mess that needs to be swept or wiped clean. It’s Y-O-U.
Society often harshly judge mums who can’t “do it all”; not only are you expected to care for a child, but you’re also expected to work, make social calls, shop, look good, and be supportive and loving to your partner. Let’s throw “keeping the house clean” into the mix and voila! We’ve got THE perfect woman. Wow!
We all know this is baloney. (cue eye roll emoji)
Letting yourself be the top priority (aside from your children of course) allows you to recharge, destress, and focus on the other things that need your attention in the house. Indulging in yourself won’t make you a bad mum. In fact it will make you a better one.
Whether quality time to you means reading a book, doing a hobby, or catching up on your favourite Netflix series, make sure to allow yourself those few precious moments before the chaos comes-a-calling. You know, those little critters we call our children.
Set A Routine In Place
When my first child came along, I resolved to cleaning the house AS SOON AS I saw a mess. As you might have guessed, it was stressful. I resented myself for allowing certain parts of the house to be “dirty”. When my second child came, I knew that I needed to be smarter about this whole cleaning up business. What I’ve learned is that it helps a great deal to have a routine.
Yes, a routine.
As you might have guessed, your little child thrives on routines. We have to give them more credit than they receive. They’re smart enough to know when it’s past their naptime. Setting a cleaning routine that revolves around your child will makes things easier for you to handle. When you have older kids, then it is safe to presume that they’d be out of the house for a few hours because of school. Take advantage of this time to keep everything in tip top shape.
Your routine will change from time to time, especially as your children grow older. What matters here is that you have a schedule that you can easily follow on a daily or weekly basis. The goal of having a routine is to make cleaning less of a stress and more of a habit.
Tips to Keep Your House Clean
● The Purge – nope, I’m not talking about the thriller movie here, but the concept is quite similar. Get rid of things you don’t need NOW. Yes, I’m talking about those ribbons and banners you’ve been keeping *just in case* you decide to have a random children’s party one Saturday afternoon. Letting go of things that are of no use to you lessens the
chance of creating clutter. Have the whole family create a weekly purging of things you all don’t need. You’ll be surprised at how many of the things we own finds its way to the bin. Any other things that can be reused again should be donated to a local shelter. You’ll never know — Mr. Cuddles can be someone else’s favourite toy.
● Have a common area – setup a common area where you and everyone else in the house can find certain things. In my house I have an arts and crafts drawer where the kids can easily get art materials AND return them after they’re done with it. Have common area for little ones child-friendly; that means no sharp objects, nothing hazardous within their reach, and away from electrical outlets.
● Surfaces should be clutter-free – ever notice how almost each household has “the table”? It’s where a hodgepodge of things are usually dumped. Groceries, kids’ bags, crayons, hoodies… you name it, “the table” probably has it. Prevent this from happening by keeping all surfaces clean. This will teach everyone at home that the tables and countertops are meant to be as they are – clutter-free.
● Have a daily and weekly routine – list down all the things that you do to keep the house looking fresh and clean. Now categorize them — which ones do you do daily? How about weekly? Doing this helps you spread out tasks so you won’t be feeling overwhelmed. An example of a daily task is doing the dishes. This is something you ought NOT to do on a weekly basis, for obvious reasons (unless you’re keen on inviting rodents and cockroaches into your home, then by all means go ahead!). If you have a small household, the laundry can be done weekly. When these tasks are strategically scheduled on certain days and times, you’ll feel more in control.
● Involve your children – this means that they can start doing chores if they haven’t already. Children just LOVE to be involved with everything. I know mine does. When their curiosity is triggered while you clean, take that golden opportunity to teach them how to tidy up in a fun and creative way. When you see them do it, praise them for doing
a good job. When they see how happy you will be when the room isn’t a mess, they’ll develop the habit of cleaning up after themselves. To them they’re not cleaning; they’re just trying to make you happy. Older kids, however, aren’t so naive. Let them clean their room the way THEY want to. It gives them a bit of control and independence (things
teens crave so much), plus you don’t have to deal with a “Mum! Where did you put my_____? I left it on top of my desk!” You may be itching to do it yourself but don’t give in. The important thing here is that they’re helping out with the cleaning. Plus you’re teaching them important skills like organizing.
● Call for help – if you’ve gotten yourself in a mess (both literally and figuratively) then it’s time for some assistance. Pristine Home has professional cleaners who’ll drop by your house and do the cleaning for you. This is a service you can avail of whenever you feel the need to. Here’s a handy tip: after they’ve cleaned your home, try to keep it that way. There will be less effort on your end.
A Mum’s Advice
Cleaning can be such a chore but it doesn’t have to be. Your life as a stay at home mum doesn’t revolve around cleaning. Once in a while the mess will lay forgotten, the paint splatters will have been left to dry on the wall, and the laundry unfolded. Instead of cleaning you might find yourself helping your little one out with a booboo or having a heart to heart talk with your teen.
A clean home most definitely isn’t a measure of how good of a mum you are. While the mess can be an eyesore, the children will soon grow up and start living lives of their own. When that happens, you’ll find yourself missing all the mess and chaos and for a fleeting moment you’d wish to turn back time just to see the house the way it was when the children were little – in complete and utter disarray.
And I bet you’d love it.
